A New York Expensive Minute

A New York minute is about 50 dollars.

You walk out of your apartment and you are charged just by sucking in oxygen.

So your time is pretty damn expensive. Good thing New Yorkers have a great habit of not wasting time, for the most part.

Dating here is like a New York minute. One second they’re there, and then they’re gone.

Poof!

They vanish into thin air just like your bank account when you are too lazy to go to Trader Joe’s and decide to go to Morton Williams instead.

Morton Williams is a New York version of Whole Foods combined with a Jewish grandmother’s basement.

My dog always gets the nice Jewish bubbies to give him a treat.

One day, I’ll just ask them to set me up with their nice Jewish grandsons.

But from living in New York, I’ve learned that an NJB may just be a JB.

Nice is a loose term.

Nice Jewish boys in the New York tradition tend to want to escape the stereotype, in my 6 months of experience.

They come to New York to wipe the “Greenberg,” “Goldstein,” name-tag they were given. They prefer to become Chad Walker from Connecticut, an investment banker with addictive tendencies and a mother in the NRA.

They stay for a New York minute and they last for a New York minute. They take your time, money, and purity like it’s their job.

But here’s the thing about New York, being a twenty-something with or without a blog is always a good time.

To the start of more blog posts in 2022!

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